Jess' Eating Disorder Recovery Story

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After struggling through quite a few traumatic events as a child, Jess found themself searching for answers about their true life purpose, their identity, and their goals for the future. They felt as if they could never catch a break, and it always seemed like they were running from their fears and struggles, enveloped in the emotions of feeling stuck and feeling worthless. At the age of 14 years old, Jess began looking for ways to cope and began purposefully punishing themself by not eating. 

As Jess got older, they began to notice their eating habits not only changed but also led to other fears – such as living alone, grocery shopping, doing laundry, or driving. Their eating disorder voice was so loud in their head that they felt completely stuck and as if there was no way out. The only coping strategies Jess had were using substances, movies, and video games as a way to escape their reality because help didn’t seem like it was ever a real option. 

“I depended on my eating disorder. It gave me false hope that I was in control of something in my life. It made me feel like I had a purpose when my life felt hopeless. It was just so easy for me to fall into that trap. I felt like my life was worthless, I was depressed, I was using drugs to cope, and I was doing escapism as much as I could. All of these things were a perfect storm for me to fall into my eating disorder – and deeply. It happened so fast. I avoided food – at all costs.”

When Jess began losing their love for art, skipping work more and more, and noticing they couldn’t even talk to their spouse about what they were struggling with, Jess reached out to a therapist. After a couple of months, Jess’ therapist realized their eating habits were irregular and disordered, and she begged Jess to get the intensive care that they needed. Jess did, found Eating Disorder Solutions, and they’ve never looked back since. 

While at Eating Disorder Solutions, Jess connected with themself in ways they never felt possible. They began feeling increasingly comfortable speaking up for themselves, connecting to their identity, and advocating for their wants and needs. Jess finally came into a place of self-love, treating themself with much more self-compassion and respect.

Jess’ love for people shone through while receiving treatment because once they began noticing the changes in themselves, they wanted to continue helping others who were just starting on their recovery journey. They gained confidence, pride, and love for themselves and life again, and while being interviewed, you could literally see the joy exude off of them as they spoke about seeing other clients heal and thrive at Eating Disorder Solutions. 

Although it was very bittersweet for them to leave Eating Disorder Solutions, they now feel confident enough to step back into the world and make a bee-line for their goals. Jess is heavily involved in the LGBTQ+ community and is driven to make a difference for others who are struggling with their identity and mental health, as they know that many individuals within the community struggle with eating disorders as well. 

“I want other people to know that there are people like them that went through this process. And I want them to come here, I want them to be happy, and I want them to find their purpose and advocate for themselves. I never felt like I could accomplish anything because of my eating disorder, but now I’m in a place where I’m just full of hope, where hope wasn’t there before.”

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Video Testimonial Summary

Key Takeaways from Jess’s Story

Identity-Affirming Care: Jess chose EDS specifically because the website explicitly mentioned transgender patients and featured a non-binary staff member, making them feel safe and accepted before even arriving.
A Decade of Unacknowledged Struggle: Jess’s eating disorder began in middle school and escalated through college and young adulthood, fueled by depression, anxiety, isolation, and substance use — often without Jess recognizing it as an eating disorder at all.
Learning to Believe They Deserved Help: A core theme of Jess’s recovery was overcoming the belief that they did not deserve to get better. Therapy and peer support at EDS helped them internalize their own self-worth.
Finding Their Voice: Advocating for their pronouns at EDS gave Jess a backbone and helped them learn to assert their wants, needs, and feelings — a skill that extended far beyond treatment.
A Message for the LGBTQ+ Community: Jess’s primary motivation for sharing their story is to show other trans, non-binary, and queer individuals that there is a treatment center that truly accepts and celebrates them.

Video Testimonial Transcript

The Beginning: Seeking Control and Attention

My pronouns are they/them. I identify as a trans woman and this is my story at EDS. In like 8th grade, 9th grade, I guess I was really struggling with my father leaving when I was younger and he became like distant from me and I wanted his attention back. And so I started to look up ways basically to engage in that sort of behavior. And so for a really long time I always thought I wanted my eating disorder because I looked it up online in a way. But I think that also because I was just seeking help from anyone but didn’t know how to voice it — like in a way that I can like control myself and maybe someone would pick up that I was struggling — to like self-harm myself with my eating disorder.
And so when I was younger and I actively sought out information about EDs, I was looking up all sorts of things like Pro Ana and thinspo. And I feel like a lot of people will get that kind of stuff. And I had like a friend and we would encourage each other to lose weight and to starve. And really the whole thing — I would also look up books at Barnes and Noble as a kid looking for more information on eating disorders. I would read young adult novels, you know, fiction that were about eating disorders. I would try to pick up tips from them. I tried chew and spitting, I tried purging. I did everything I could to deal with how I was feeling without saying a word about it.

Comparing Myself to Others

And I also had a friend that was really close to my age and I thought that she was perfect and I wanted to be just like her and she was pretty and all the boys liked her and her mom put her on diet pills and I was like that — that is what I need. So I remember asking my mom when I was in the ninth grade if I could be on a diet pill. So after I tried like the diet pills and I didn’t like them, I just resorted into skipping lunch every day at school. My friend did that — she just drank a bottle of water and I was like okay I can do that too.

The Eating Disorder in College and Early Adulthood

It kind of went away during high school and then when I went to college I also felt like I had to go to college like as soon as I graduated high school. All my friends were going straight into college. I felt like I wasn’t able to take like a year off and figure out myself. I just straight went into it. I really didn’t feel like I could feed myself. I really didn’t think that I could live off campus and cook for myself. I really think that looking back on it that was part of my eating disorder — like coming out in a way of like, “Yeah, you can’t live off campus, yeah you absolutely can’t go shopping for yourself, you’re afraid of driving, you can’t do any of these things, you have to stay here.” My biggest fear of graduating was how do I take care of myself?
23 years old, I am fresh from college, I graduated and I was like, how in the hell am I going to survive? I felt like okay I can buy food for like two weeks but I noticed my eating disorder would come back out sometimes. I didn’t even realize it was a behavior to avoid going grocery shopping because I was so afraid of like going outside that I didn’t want to leave my apartment. Because my personality at the time was really like timid and shy and I didn’t believe in myself. I didn’t have any self-confidence, any self-worth. So my ED kind of like came and went. I didn’t even really think of it as a problem to me.

Falling Deeper: Depression, Isolation, and Relapse

Like I actively sought out my eating disorder when I was like 14, 15. So I didn’t really feel like I had an eating disorder. But looking back now I do see myself where I would struggle and I would depend on it because it made me feel better. It gave my life purpose when I didn’t feel like I had any purpose. Like my life was hopeless and I had nothing to offer, so I would just go straight into my ED and that was very difficult for me.
I was already in a fragile state. I was already skipping work. My life didn’t feel like it was good anymore. So all of this was going on and it didn’t help that I was watching America’s Next Top Model a couple months previously because that really affected my eating disorder — even though I never even called it an ED at the time. Just seeing people compare their bodies, looking a certain way. I felt like I had to look a certain way and I really feel like that fueled me to dive deeper into my ED because I was so depressed, so anxious. I didn’t really see like the harm in going deeper into my eating disorder.
I think maybe even before then I was already restricting without even noticing it because it’s so easy for me to fall into that trap of like, “Okay, my life is worthless, I am depressed, I’m using drugs to cope, I am doing escapism, I’m in video games all day, I’m in my pajamas, I’m not leaving the house.” All these things were a perfect storm for me to fall back into my ED deeply. It happened so fast. I avoided food at all costs. I avoided the smell. I avoided people eating in front of me because I ate in isolation. I felt like I could hide a little bit and also lie about how much I was eating. I wasn’t eating that much because I felt like I justified myself. I judged myself so harshly. I felt like I deserved to stop eating.

Being Called Out by a Friend

I had a friend at the time who I found out also struggles with an eating disorder. He is my pal online. He was the first person to call it out — to say what it is. No one had really told me, “Hey, you have an eating disorder, did you know that?” And I was like in complete denial. I was like, “There’s just no way I have an eating disorder because how can I have an eating disorder if I deserve to stop eating?”
My friend, he would check on me like every day. He would ask me, “Are you eating? Did you eat today?” It felt nice to be checked up on. Because my boyfriend — we were then married — he would never check in on me. He did not know. I did not want him to know. I was perfectly fine with confiding in my online friend who was sort of in another country. He couldn’t check on me physically. I didn’t find it in anyone else. I didn’t feel like I could tell my spouse what was happening to me because he would probably dismiss it.
He did convince me to tell my spouse, and I did tell him, “Hey, I am struggling with an eating disorder but I don’t need your help. I got it.” I didn’t have it at all. But I was just so content with doing what I was doing — still using drugs to cope, still struggling through depression and anxiety, not seeing a therapist but talking to my friend like he was a therapist. He wasn’t. We were both unhealthy emotionally, so it was a really kind of toxic friendship.

Seeking Treatment and the Six-Day Crisis

I got my first eating disorder therapist — she mostly did addiction and she didn’t really think that my eating disorder was like the main problem at first. It’s not her specialty, but she knows about them and so she did kind of help me. I worked through my feelings about it with her. Until — well, I was also weighing myself more frequently. I was going down the rabbit hole. I found the scale in my spouse’s room. Every time he would leave the apartment I would immediately grab it and weigh because I was like, “I have to know how much.”
Because I was at a point in my eating disorder where I would go without food for as long as possible. I was only drinking water and like sweet tea at the time, or even tried to go without water. And then I was just like, let’s try to go 24 hours without eating. I made it six days. Six days without food, period. It was horrible. It was going to be like a test of endurance for me. And I just remember I talked to my therapist and I was like, “Okay, so I’ve been restricting for six days today and I don’t know how to stop.” And my therapist begged me to sign ROIs — release of information — for my spouse and my mom, because it was getting to a point where she was like, “I can no longer help you. What you did to yourself over these six days is too intense for me to deal with. I’m not trained in eating disorders. You have to see an eating disorder therapist and you have to seek treatment.”

Choosing EDS: A Place That Sees Them

My dietitian said she’s in the Facebook group for dietitians and someone there had mentioned this place. I went to their website. I saw that they had mentioned the word “transgender” on their website. I was completely blown away. They say that they treat all genders. I was just like stunned. I was like, “Finally, somewhere that could treat people like me with respect.” So when I went to the EDS website I think there’s like a little heart with a rainbow and I was like, “Yes, okay, this place is for me.” And plus I saw an interview with a staff member who is non-binary and I was like, “Okay, if someone is on staff that is non-binary, someone like me that I can relate to, that can help me through my ED — yes, perfect. I’m so excited.”
I really just wanted to be believed that I had an eating disorder and that it was real. Because to me, a lot of my ED was like — I was in denial. I was still in denial for like two years. I didn’t believe it.

Finding Confidence and Voice at EDS

I think reminding yourself of your goals, what you want to achieve, is extremely important. Because for me when I got here I knew the place I was in, I knew the place that I wanted to be in, but I didn’t know how to do the middle part. I didn’t know how to do the journey. Not really knowing that part was really scary because I just wanted to already be healed — in the package with the bow and everything like that.
And once I felt more comfortable here and I felt comfortable going to my therapists — both of my therapists, all the therapists — the insight that they would give me, the feedback that they would give me, the fact that they believed in me, they believed that I had an eating disorder — I felt more comfortable standing up for myself. Other clients would lift me up. I don’t remember exactly the turn in my recovery, but I just remember like accepting praise from people is very difficult for me. Like it kind of goes through one ear and out the other. But I remember like speaking up in group one time and telling another client about the progress that they made and reminding them of that. And my therapist was like, “Well, if you can do that for someone else, you can do that for yourself.” Just feeling confident again — and like this confidence, I have never felt before. And yeah, I’m eating 100% and trying to focus on me.
Self-compassion was like a really big lesson that I learned here. Speaking to yourself as you would a friend. Using my coping skills — it sounds cheesy but they do really work.

Deserving Help and Advocating for Yourself

I would say it is extremely difficult to seek help when you don’t feel like you deserve it. I definitely didn’t feel like I deserved to get better because of the situation I was in, where my life was going. I was unemployed and I felt extremely stuck. I felt like I deserved it. You really do have to look inside and get help for yourself. As a people pleaser, I understand you want to do it to help other people, but in order for me to live my life the way I want to, I had to look inside and believe that I deserve to get better.
Because people would tell me I deserve to feel better, I deserve to seek help, and I didn’t really believe it. When you do come to a place of residential care or PHP, IOP, things like that, you’ll be surrounded by people who do care. And sometimes that can be hard because you’re like, “I don’t deserve all this care.” But please do remind yourself that you are deserving of care and that your life really does matter.

The Hobbit and Letting Go of the Eating Disorder

At the time of being here I was reading The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien and I chose that book to bring with me because it’s an adventure book and I felt like I was going on an adventure. Bilbo and me were similar — just the fact that Bilbo was able to leave his home of comfort, the Hobbit Hill and the Shire, and that he was able to take a leap of faith with a bunch of dwarves that he didn’t really know, for him to go on the adventure and go through trials and tribulations. And just the fact that at the beginning of Lord of the Rings, he gives Frodo the ring — no other being is able to do that, to give up something so tempting. And I think that really does speak to eating disorder treatment: you have to give up your eating disorder in order to get better.
That was very difficult for me because my eating disorder was my best friend. It was there for me all throughout my life, even if I didn’t realize it. It was there for me. It comforted me. It told me I was safe. But it was hurting me. It was killing me. And to come to that realization was difficult to accept. But I do feel a lot stronger. I feel like I can recognize my voice versus the ED voice. I know coping skills which I didn’t know before. I feel really supported by my friends here and by the staff here.

A Message to the LGBTQ+ Community

I also am an artist and I like to paint — right now I’m painting and I’m encouraged to paint. I paint during group. And the main reason that I wanted to do this interview — not only for myself — is I really, really want to show another person out there that is like me, that is trans or trans non-binary or non-binary or just like gender fluid or anything like that, that they are queer and that they are accepted here.
There was a moment like when I went outside and I saw a rock — because we get to paint a rock when you get discharged — and it has the intersex symbol and also the trans pride flag painted on it. And just seeing that gave me so much hope. Like there were other past clients that were trans or non-binary or intersex and in the queer community and they survived. They overcame their eating disorder. And there is a huge overlap with eating disorders and LGBTQ+ people and I really feel like more education needs to be spoken about them because that is not the narrative.

Looking Toward the Future

Part of my goals of recovery is to get to a place where I am financially and emotionally stable so that I can medically transition. That is my goal. And keeping my goals in mind while being here, I feel like I am closer to my goals. I feel so ecstatic that my future can look different and that my life can be different. Because my life was so stuck where I was before. I was basically in a marriage where I don’t feel accepted. We are separating. I want to live on my own. I want to adopt a cat. I want to start HRT. And I want other people that are queer to know that there is someone like them that went through this process and I want them to come here. I want them to be happy and I want them to find their purpose and advocate for themselves.
Because really, advocating for myself — just my pronouns when I first got here — has really given me a backbone in order for myself to assert what I want, to say what I need, to know that my wants and needs are important and my feelings do matter. My life matters and I am whole and complete. I just really want to help other people. I feel like that is my dream — to use art and advocacy for other people that are like me. And I never really felt like I could accomplish my dreams because I would rather die from my eating disorder than to live my life. Now I’m in a place where I am just full of hope where hope wasn’t there before. And I just want someone to see this and be like, “That’s like me and I can come there and I can thrive.” Because I’m just so excited. That’s all.
Anorexia Nervosa Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Anorexia Nervosa Treatment

Our anorexia nervosa treatment focuses on restoring healthy eating habits and addressing underlying psychological issues. Individual therapy, nutritional counseling, and medical monitoring are integrated to support clients in achieving a balanced relationship with food and body image.

Bulimia Nervosa Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Bulimia Nervosa Treatment

Bulimia treatment aims to break the binge-purge cycle by addressing the emotional triggers and behaviors associated with bulimia. Therapy and nutritional support help clients develop healthier coping mechanisms and improve their relationship with food.

Binge Eating Disorder Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Binge Eating Disorder Treatment

Our binge eating disorder treatment program focuses on managing the emotional factors that lead to overeating. Clients receive therapy and nutritional guidance to develop healthier eating habits and gain control over their eating behaviors.

Body Dysmorphia Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Body Dysmorphia Treatment

Body dysmorphia treatment helps clients challenge distorted perceptions of their body image. Through specialized therapy, clients learn to develop a more realistic and positive view of their appearance, reducing obsession and anxiety.

ARFID Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

ARFID Treatment

Treatment for Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) focuses on expanding dietary variety and reducing food avoidance behaviors. Our program uses therapeutic interventions tailored to the individual’s needs to promote nutritional health.

OSFED Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

OSFED Treatment

Other Specified Feeding or Eating Disorders (OSFED) are treated with customized care plans that address their unique symptoms. Our program provides therapy and support to help clients develop a healthy relationship with food.

UFED Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

UFED Treatment

For Unspecified Feeding or Eating Disorders (UFED), we offer personalized therapy that meets each client’s specific needs, promoting recovery and overall well-being.

Orthorexia Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Orthorexia Treatment

Orthorexia treatment focuses on reducing the obsession with “perfect” eating. Our approach helps clients develop a balanced relationship with food, emphasizing health without rigid dietary rules.

Compulsive Overeating Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Compulsive Overeating Treatment

Our treatment for compulsive overeating targets the emotional triggers that lead to overeating. Clients learn to manage these triggers through therapy and nutritional counseling and adopt healthier eating patterns.

Co-Occurring Disorder Treatment Eating Disorder Solutions Therapy Session

Co-Occurring Disorder Treatment

We provide integrated care for clients with eating disorders and co-occurring mental health conditions. This comprehensive approach ensures that all aspects of a client’s well-being are addressed, supporting recovery and overall mental health.

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After completing 75 consecutive days of treatment at Eating Disorder Solutions, if you experience a significant setback you can receive an additional 75 consecutive days of treatment at no cost.

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Eating Disorder Solutions offers personalized residential and outpatient eating disorder treatment in the Dallas, TX area. We provide treatment with integrity, promoting holistic approaches that heal the mind, body, and soul. If you’re ready to begin your recovery journey, call us now at 855-245-0961 or complete the form.

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OSFED Who We Treat at Eating Disorder Solutions All Ages of Adults

Adults of All Ages

We treat adults across all life stages, from young professionals to those in midlife or retirement. Some have battled OSFED since adolescence, while others develop symptoms later in life due to stress, health changes, or personal loss.

OSFED Who We Treat at Eating Disorder Solutions College Students

College Students

College life can increase OSFED risk, with pressures from academics, social comparison, and irregular eating patterns. We help students develop balanced routines, manage campus triggers, and build coping strategies for dining halls, parties, and late-night study sessions.

OSFED Who We Treat at Eating Disorder Solutions LGBTQIA+ Individuals

LGBTQ+ Individuals

We provide affirming, culturally sensitive care for LGBTQ+ clients, recognizing the unique impact of stigma, body image pressures, or gender dysphoria. Our team creates a safe space where clients can explore identity issues and learn healthier ways to cope without relying on disordered eating.

OSFED Who We Treat at Eating Disorder Solutions Adult Athletes

Athletes

Athletes may develop OSFED due to weight pressures, performance demands, or rigid training routines. Our sports-informed team helps clients balance proper nutrition with athletic goals while addressing perfectionism and identity tied to sport.

OSFED Who We Treat at Eating Disorder Solutions Working Professionals

Working Professionals

High-pressure careers can fuel disordered eating patterns like skipping meals, nighttime overeating, or extreme dieting. We offer flexible in-person and virtual OSFED treatment options to fit around busy work schedules and professional demands.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Yes. EDS is explicitly committed to treating patients of all gender identities, including transgender, non-binary, gender fluid, and intersex individuals. Jess chose EDS specifically because the website mentioned transgender patients and featured a non-binary staff member, making them feel safe and accepted before even arriving.

Yes. As Jess highlights in their story, there is a significant and well-documented overlap between eating disorders and LGBTQ+ individuals. EDS recognizes this connection and provides identity-affirming care designed to address the unique challenges faced by queer patients.

Eating disorders frequently develop as a coping mechanism for unresolved emotional pain, trauma, or instability. Jess’s disorder was rooted in the grief of their father becoming distant, and it served as a way to manage feelings they didn’t know how to express.

Yes. Jess spent years in denial, believing they didn’t “deserve” to have an eating disorder. This is a common experience. Eating disorders can be deeply internalized and normalized, making professional diagnosis and validation a critical first step in recovery.

Yes. Jess’s recovery involved addressing depression, anxiety, and substance use alongside their eating disorder. EDS’s whole-person treatment model ensures that all co-occurring conditions are treated simultaneously, rather than in isolation.

At EDS, patients are encouraged to advocate for their needs from day one. For Jess, simply asserting their pronouns upon arrival was the first step in building a backbone and learning to express their wants, needs, and feelings with confidence.

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